On the last day of April, the last day of Heisei period was rainy and cold. Even now it was a bit unbelievable that new period will begin from tomorrow.
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This evening was reunion of friends from care group when I first began to live in Sendai. I enjoyed conversation over supper. They are precious friends, when I was spending the hardest time, with little hope to be socialized, let alone find a job, in an unfamiliar place. If I hadn't had this friendship, I'm not certain if I would have gotten back my communication skills, and connection with people, of workplace and local society.
It was a shame that I became back a monster student in the first year of university, in 1995. Every time I attend a class I panicked and fell into a meltdown. At last I was almost hospitalized, in the summer. When I was in elementary school, I was like a monster child, who couldn't attend classes without a panic. In junior high school and high school, my behavior and mental state was much improved, although I was still uneasy every day, not certain of I would survive my school life of the next day.
I hadn't actually forgotten my swimming goggle! What a shame ^^; I went swimming at 3:30 p.m. taking advantage of a paid holiday. When I change clothes, I couldn't find my new swimming goggle. I took my old goggle, cleaned up, and set it up. When I wear this, ... another goggle was already on my head, and just ready to wear. What I had forgot wasn't the goggle, but the fact that I wore my swimming cap, and new goggle at the very first time of changing clothes. I began a kind of circle swim today, beginning with 54 seconds for 50 meters, 16 seconds for rest, and total 200 meters. At the first time it was little bit tough, and the second time, after 200 meters slow swimming, was really hard. I want to try various paces and intervals, and also am thinking of taking up some drills.
I failed this time. My understanding is not enough to solve problems during the time of exams. - IPA Japan Database Specialist exam. Also, I didn't really understand how a deadlock happens, and how to avoid it. This make me make a wrong answer in the morning 2 test, and beaten by time burner questions and the afternoon 1 test. I did relatively well in the afternoon 2 test, but my answers of it won't be graded, because I will be certainly disqualified in the grade of the afternoon 1 test.
Questions are great help with which I know where and how to read design documents of the subject of the test, as well as I have to solve them. I'm tackling past tests of IPA Japan Database Specialist exam. In the afternoon parts of the exam, it is required to read, point out problems, improve, and complete design documents of some systems to meet particular needs of businesses.
I have long been away from stamina training. The last time I jogged more than 10 kilometers are 3 years ago. Since then I was so into video games mentally so tired that I find it hard to spare time and energy to training. Today I restarted stamina training, 12 kilometer jogging in the morning and 2 kilometer swimming in the afternoon.
Just a few minutes ago, I used a PDF print service at a convenience store for the first time. I printed exam questions of last year. In the morning, I had gotten PDF files to print, and tried to print before I was set to work, but I thought twice to see I have to print more than 30 sheets for a part of the test. In the evening, I re-outputted PDF with 2 pages, half the size, side-by-side for one sheet, and halved the number of sheets, went to another convenience store this time near home, and printed. I printed 27 sheets for near 60 pages. The next action was how I take advantage and learn as much as possible from that printed test questions.
I know little about laugh as entertainment, but I laugh quite often. I know little about what make the majority of people laugh, and I think what I find funny are often different from other people. Also, I tend to stick to one or two particular episodes which make me laugh out loud, and sometimes I go on visiting the site, when they were on the web like a YouTube video, for month or even a few years.
I often vending machines to buy canned coffees. I like bottle can black, without artificial aroma, and prefer hot to cold. In spring, products vending machines are changed, and some vending machines stop dealing with hot soft drinks. This is a bit of frustration to me. when I checked the vending machine I had bought a hot bottle canned coffee, I found something was strange. Apparently, the bottle I had bought for 130 yen had the price tag of 120 yen. Had I forget taking the change, paying extra 10 yen? Then my surprise doubled. Certainly the same coffee can bottle I had bought, but it was being served "cold". In the morning, I had bought "hot". The vending machine in my office deals with hot drinks in winter, but in spring all drinks it deals with are cold. In April, and perhaps in May, there will be some cold days, and also in June, in the middle of rainy season. In any cases, I miss hot drinks, which is a bit of frustration, even though I know I can get hot d...
When I was a child, I liked to sketch automobiles. I liked to sketch both real and imaginary ones. I also liked to imagine specs of those cars, although I didn't really understand mechanics, and just strongly affected by the fantastic aspects of articles in car magazines and catalogs. I look back on my sketches then and noticed that there were no men, no humans in the sketches. Cars only. The cabins some of those cars didn't even have enough space for men. I noticed that fact just a few years ago, when I began to draw humans, and I tried to draw cars with people, and the men I drew was too big for the cars I drew, their faces are even as big as windshields, and retry drawing them, resizing their size to the half of original size.
I went swimming for the first time in 3 weeks. I missed swimming until then, because: _ 2 Weeks ago, the weekend after a paid leave, I was too tired a day after skiing to want to go swimming. _ Last week we had heavy snow, which discouraged me from going outside. I rediscovered today that swimming contribute to my mental fitness as well as physical, after I swam, although it take a little bit more energy when I almost lost the habit of swimming.
Today I went skiing. I didn't imagine I go to ski in this April, in the beginning of March, without snow in the city and around home, and even snow on mountains are melting. That was my 19th skiing for this season, and probably it's the last time for the season. These days wind was strong, so I was worried about if ski lift would run, but the wind in the mountain wasn't so strong compared to the city, and relatively comfortable condition for skiing.
In my fourth grade of elementary school, in the spring in 1985, old passenger cars disappeared from the railroad running through the region I was in. New crimson passenger cars were used for all local passenger trains in the area. I was disappointed then, because I liked old dull-blue or dark brown passenger car, influenced by my brother. Steam locomotives had no longer been used years before I was born, so those passenger cars were drugged by ED75 electric locomotive. Before I entered elementary school, electric car limited expresses and expresses were also running on the railroad, but they also disappeared when Tohoku Shinkansen bullet train line was in use in 1982. Watching railroad cars was one of those my amusement, being somehow alienated in school, and once I began to talk about railroad cars, I never stopped before interrupted by the bell of beginning of the next class. I had several picture books of express trains all over Japan, and dreamed about riding some of them...
Easier to write a daily entry when I listen English a lot. I listen podcasts, from BBC, CBS and Effortless English Teacher. When I'm tired I want to listen to music rather than speeches, and also find myself much harder to write, and decide what to write. When I'm in shape enough to like to listen to speeches, I feel much more free to write, without worrying about grammatical errors. When it comes to inform my audience more important information and knowledge, I will be more conscious of grammatical correctness, but now I think that I'm in the stage where I establish the habit of writing something, at least one word a day, and hopefully increasing the word count of my writing, and a bit conscious of what to tell the reader of my writing, if ever. Free to write what I have in mind (but actually, regretfully only very small part of it) is the main stance of here now. I hope I will be able to tell what I experienced and felt when I was elementary school, junior high s...
I have had a few experiences of helping other people even when I was in elementary school, not only I caused troubles with classmates almost every day. Unfortunately however, the horrible experiences of being alienated by classmates then have masked and blew away from my memory the rest of my experiences then, like a few things I contributed to my classroom or my family. This prevented me from thinking of a point of how I'm able to contribute, an important view in seeking for a job. I struggled to recover those memories of myself being somehow helpful and caring, and finally found a few episodes. Also In university, I helped struggling classmates at a class of computer programing, numerical simulation of ordinary differential equations.
Continuing to work and never giving up. These are one of few thing I can give. Still I have to continue to fight against the illusion of the past, people around me then who I could hardly get along with when I was in elementary school. People are different and even my personality is different from those then, so I think that why don't I forget about low opinion about me more than 30 years ago. However the scar from terrible relationship with classmate still is preventing me from thinking that I have a few personalities and capabilities with which I can give something variable. If all that I remember about me when I was in elementary school are about low opinions about me, it will be really unfortunate. I could also remember what I liked then, railroad cars and automobiles, plants and bugs.