Maitta! Always - Daily Amazing Confusions -

I'm so far away from learning foreign languages, because I focus on web page creating until the middle of November. There's so big fear of defeat on me. I learned to make wireframes for website design. I'm choosing pictures. There are so many pictures on my PC that it takes very long time to even view a tenth of them.

In the beginning of this month I was planning to refurbish my blog. I was thinking of suitable subjects that my blog deals with. I just ended up in missing the habit of posting something every day. In the period I was away from here, I was busy and tired from preparing for Network Specialist exam, and even after the exam ended on last Sunday, I have still been worn out. Before I stop my blog update, I was reviewing my motivation for blogging. In the beginning right after 2009, I wanted and sought approval from outside, from other people. This sometime caused troubles in interaction with Japanese bloggers who deal with topics on autism spectrum disorder. At that time I didn't see authors' personalities at all and I was just thinking I could relate to them just because I had gone through similar hardships to theirs. I just imposed my experiences and my personality on their comment walls. 5 years later, I noticed that just imposing my own experiences without paying respect...

Sensan line is suspended today due to the sediment disaster from the heavy rain of the typhoon that passed our area early in the morning of yesterday. Seeing the picture of landslide on the railroad , I was surprised. Although there was no serious damage around my place, as for the railway, it looks like there were in some places on the track of railroads. Fortunately, today is the national holiday Sports Day and I don't have to go to work. I'm not sure I'm even more fortunate enough to take train to work for tomorrow. I hope the restoration work will have been done by tomorrow morning. Otherwise, I will take the bus, which is going to crowded both inside the car and the road.

I missed posting my blog yesterday because I was too anxious about the typhoon. Last night my area had a lot of rain I had never experienced ever before, like other areas in Japan, Kanto and Tohoku region. Fortunately for me, the typhoon is passing at last, and looks like infrastructures around our area is OK. Electricity and tap water is available, and probably gas is OK too.

If you don't begin to write something, you can't join forever. This is one important lesson I have learned from my 10-year blogging experience. If I didn't begin to write something, I wouldn't be writing here like this way. So far, this blog hasn't been grown as I initially dreamed about. However, continuing this blog and never quitting was quite a good start, reading someone else's entry saying that 90 percent of bloggers quit from writing. Even though 99.9 percent of my entries so far have been low quality. In order to grow my blog, first I need to improve quality of my posts. To achieve this, I want to write as much as possible, in attempt to find what I should focus on. I also need to read, read and read to learn style and word usages of writing which are appreciated highly. There are a lot of things to do and a long way left to grow my blog, but not forgetting the mind when I opened this blog (even though I began it rather lightheartedly) is also import...

This time of last year, September and October, 2018 , I was making a lot of Efforts. One, for Abilympics, I was making my best for creating a web site. In that year, I was especially focused on handling a database in PHP. Another was studying a lot of basics, apps, and commands of Linux, for preparation for LPIC Level 2 exams. For those two purposes, I was building a test server and encounter several troubles, mostly from security settings of initial condition right after installation. In order to accept Web, FTP, and file server traffic, you need to change iptable setting to permit these traffics, and you may also need to care for SELinux setting. I searched on the web, reached a temporary solution, and permitted target traffic from my local networks. It was quite a good training for managing a host and a website, useful for both goals I was striving for.

From 2002 to 2004 I learned French from 2002 to 2004. I was so shy that I only listened the classes and didn't participate in practice conversations among the teacher and classmates. I also went to open university to see learning friends, most of who were middle-aged or older, yet showed stronger will to learn than the young students of the university I actually belonged to. Open university had given us a chance to get back my joy of learning, having long been forgotten in those miserable, empty first 3 years, with the most serious panic and mental breakdown at university. I was still easily get panicked from trivial things, but I had gotten able to attend minimum classes and hand in reports in spite of my panics. The last two years in Sapporo I made much greater progresses than years before. Yet I also experienced a major defeat. I gave up my advancement to doctor's course. I couldn't achieve neither of them: 1. Pass a designated tests to be qualified for advancement 2...

Self introduction. So many time did this word drop me into deep despair. One major reason is I suddenly forget about my personality when I hear the word "Self Introduction". Why does this happen to me? This is probably one of panic reaction out of my anxiety and fear of talking about anything to other people. When I dig deep into the reason for I'm especially shy about self introduction, I have reached one guess. Probably I have been thinking in this way. Anything I like is far from the trend, and I'm going to be laughed when I speak of what I like and what I enjoy. It's a big mistake. Even though some mean people are likely to laugh about my stammering manner of speaking with a lot of sweat, nice people won't laugh about what I like, which means what I pay respect for. Also, nice people are likely to be patient enough not to laugh my shy manner of speaking. In this way I got over one hurdle, but here's another barrier. "I still want to keep what...

I decided one thing. I will never meet the demand for gossips and complaints, however huge such demands may be. I thought that way, when I saw a blog ranking my Japanese blog belongs to and checked the most popular blogs there. Minimalists' blogs, day traders' blogs and blogs full of prejudice and gossips are among then. I may want to adopt thoughts of those minimalist, but I definitely want to quit from gossip mentality. Also, I thought that the way to be more positive should be among those top blogs, since I often search for such information, and I wish I would be able to provide success stories and tips for them. I myself, to be honest, am so easily give into the temptation to join in such things as actually have spoiled me, especially my strength. Then what need would I meet? I have no such success story as many people want to get. Well, actually, if I listen to people I see at my local church, even though my behavior at church is terrible from my panic, that I was able...

"Proper actions in your social networking media is critical to increase readers and comments on your blog." When I search for the ways to grow a blog, I hear such kind of remarks so often. Unfortunately however, I'm shy in social networking sites I have my account of, as well as real world. It was only two or three times that I posted about my blogs on such social media sites. I feel scared from social networking. Here are scares I feel about social media. A scare to see any reaction from other people about my post. Any kind. A scare to be exhausted - Even though I receive feedback a few times, if ever, a week, I check the feedback fields one time an hour when I posted something on a social networking site or a blog A scare to see discouraging news about my country or the world - I lose my energy by watching discouraging news or rumors on the web which don't really directly affect my everyday life. I let those news exhaust me and my everyday life. In order to gro...

My Japanese blog has a certain number of visitors, approximately 10 times of this blog, although I have posted on it only 10 times in this year. From 2009 to 2012, I posted every day on the blog, sometimes with a lot of photographs. One reason for the difference in audience may be that this is written my second language, but I have found a more concrete reason. When I was looking back on page views of my post on my Japanese blog, I have noticed one important point, which is missed from this blog and my Japanese blog has. A few niches appealing to a certain number of people. These niches include particular, kind of old, types of railroad cars, particular brands of canned-coffee. I know these things are not popular among mainstream majorities, but I also know that there are lot of bloggers who are enthusiastically posting their articles. My posts are not so enthusiastic, but I still have several audience. One reason this blog has only a tenth audience of my Japanese blog, I suppose, ...

I allow myself to spend this weekday totally freely. I don't blame myself because I didn't practice Photoshop or Illustrator, or preparing for Network Specialist exam taking advantage of this free time. In the beginning of this week, my mental state was so bad that I even forgot my lunch to work my mom had prepared for me. Another day of week, I forgot an item I usually bring to work. Although it wasn't really necessary for work, it makes me much more comfortable at work. In addition to those, every morning I was so irritated that I could't help taking notes of my mental state before I was set to work. In that way, I was losing my mental health and if I didn't have a proper rest, I'm going to really lose it. Going to work every day and relieve my employer and teammate, by keeping my mental state in shape. All self discipline will come after that.

Choosing time to writing a post is also important. I have been making a mistake in this time issue. It's not a good idea to write blog post in the time otherwise best for rest. Typically I write my posts before or after I have supper. This may be best time in that it's my own disposal, but it's worst in that it's the time I want be free from any duty whatever productive and whatever interesting it may be. I so often forget the fact that good rest is also necessary to do productive work daily. Then I want to choose my alternative time to compose a post. Making the time I'm much more productive and still it's my free time. I'm thinking early in the morning of weekend, or a few weekdays would be fine.

The experience of being employed has add me an important perspective. I have to be greatly grateful to this. If I were writing on behalf of my boss or my employer, the posts here would be quite different. According to articles I searched for information of how to grow a blog, setting the persona of target readers is critical. So far, unfortunately however, I have no clue of who are the visitors. If I write on behalf of a project I belong to, I will write about how the project is wonderful and how I want to grow as a group member.

Now that I have acquired the habit of posting something regularly, it's time for thinking the next step of my blogging. I'm thinking of making small income from blogging in a few years. This probably will be my next goal. I'm not sure if my idea is feasible, but this goal worthwhile tackling, and at least it will grow me, by thinking what action I must take to achieve this. First I'm changing my attitude toward blogging. Finding budget hosting for blog - Considering the traffic here now, even estimating 10 to 100 times, lowest cost among ones with freedom of multiple instances of WordPress and databases Finding my own niches - My potential niches: Automobiles, railroad cars, bugs, and enjoying coffee including canned coffee Getting better pen name - My current pen name MaittakB is totally meaningless to anybody. I'm thinking that my nickname should be changed so acceptable to a few readers Imagining hard who would read my future blog - I should be grateful ...

Consumption tax hike in Japan, with rate from 8% to 10%, itself, I find itself not totally unbearable, but this is if I don't see or hear TV and Internet news. It may affect terribly on any kind of sales, but the words tax-hike, tax-hike, and tax-hike are getting me crazy. It's a good idea to shutout news for a while to protect my mental health, until news of tax hike are kind of settled.