Maitta! Always - Daily Amazing Confusions -

I went to Sunday service 10:30 am. At first I couldn't enter the chapel during worship songs. In recent one and half year, I couldn't hardly stand the volume of the piano and voices of worship songs especially when I was tired. I myself like to sing, so I sang outside. Today it wasn't out of pitch. Sometimes I become so tired that when I try to sing, all I can do is cry out songs out of pitch. In recent weeks, we (church members) learn from the book of Matthew, from the Lord's prayer. Today we learned from "Give us today our daily bread". I learned that it's no worth worrying, and at the same time, we easily worry. I'm really easily worry. We may want to learn from birds in the sky. Recalling today's message, I recalled the birds I saw. I never see the birds in the sky look worried. It was so enlightening that I suddenly rush out from the chapel and saw in the sky. Then I didn't see any bird. Instead, I was taught that birds totally ...

CCNA exam ended and studying the subject around it became of lower priority. I came back the reading of "JavaScript The Definitive Guide". I had already read 36%. It was for the first time probably in a month. The part I read yesterday was like a compact guide of CSS, although it was a book of JavaScript. After all anipulating CSS is one big theme of JavaScript as well as controlling other web page features. Since I had already learned much about CSS, reading this part helped me guide me into regular reading of this book

Today on the way to visit the mental clinic I listened to music on iPod. I used the shuffle function. I have hardly ever used this function. The most of what I listened was the lesson tracks of English conversation, instead of songs. Usually I listen to music as well as I listen to spoken English, but the number of files of spoken English is likely to be much bigger than song files.

This week was much colder than last. Last week high temperature was 30 degrees even close to 35 degrees. This week most days high didn't reach 25 degrees. This affected my physical and mental condition, and it's taking more time to recover from the tiredness from the exam than I expected.

I have hard time these days in that little energy is left when I come home after work. On the other hand, it's not so bad that I manage to go to work regularly and manage to meet the needs of my workplace. Sometimes I feel so strange that I cry out or sing a song loud, but if I was permitted to do, I could only sing one out of pitch loudly, staggering from left to right. I have little imagined how other people are struggling with daily things. At least I can guess that my colleagues have as much or more difficulty than I have. I sometime wish that there were more people who are ready to listen to what I want to say. Then I reflect on my self. Am I a person who is ready to listen to some one else? My answer now is, regretfully, I feel too tired to listen. If so, it is easily imagine that many people may be too tired to listen to what I want to say. This is one of the problems I have encountered throughout my life since I entered elementary school.

My entire body is itchy probably from tiredness. On Saturday, I took the CCNA test and yesterday I went to a meeting of adults with developmental disabilities. This morning, I felt my entire body heavy and itchy. I realized that the exam and the meeting were overload to me. By the way the word overload also reminds me that a term on computer networks of Port Address Translation or IP masquerade.

Same as before, I counted down in the bath from 200 down to 0 this evening. On the way I counted a few bogus number. I counted "thixty-three" when I meant 63 (sixty-three). I was so worried about the pronunciation of the "th" sound of three, I pronounced "sixty" with the pronunciation like "three". I also counted "twelven" when I meant "eleven". It was probably because I was confused after when I counted twelve. It was funny that when I count down I hadn't hardly done ever, I mistakenly generate a few bogus number or a false order.