Maitta! Always - Daily Amazing Confusions -

At work I had a lot to do, for it was the end of the month. It was no problem with doing all tasks, but after all having done I noticed that my energy had almost run out. I hope tomorrow I will get back the energy with a good sleep.

Woke up 5:30 a.m. Began to study 7:00 a.m. (breakfast will be due 7:30 a.m. with a little of delay) I need to cope with my toxic personality inclined to try to draw attention. I'm supposed to learn a little bit about regional economy. I disposed of a bag of plastic waste. I had my suit cleaned. My core ability will be techniques related to Web and related information technologies. I have learned a bit about HTTP communications as well as HTML and CSS. I need to learn more. I need to improve my use of time to study more. By 9:30 a.m. I will have arrived at my work place. I smile and greet when I enter the workplace. Going to the city to work is a bit of stressful, stressful enough to make my mind blank when I am off duty rather than I enjoy something. However my working environment, such as human relationship, is more than I can expect, so I'm grateful for this blessed working environment.

This morning I felt a bit better and lighter, but my work didn't go so easily. My workload wasn't so much but it took time more than I had expected. Fortunately there was no problem with me doing my work at a slow pace. On Saturday I had bought a pair of business shoes. It will take a few more weeks until they really fit me well. My small toes a bit of sore after I came home and I took of the shoes. Also I contacted the city to ask for disposing of my bicycle I haven't used for 5 years since the big earthquake. The collection will be due in a week. Things may not advance greatly at a time, but I take small steps day by day.

My selfish way of making reports was criticized a few years ago. I then made reports, first the one it was easiest for me to take up, then another second easiest and so on. I should have made the report first what was needed the most. I mistook the priority. These days, I consider much about priorities at work, but at home, I couldn't set priority by other people's needs and often take a selfish action or make a selfish remark. I am to improve the capability to set priority at any moment of my life, at work and at home.

Until the noon I spent lazily, viewing videos of game plays in front of laptop. In the afternoon I eat out for ramen and went the city to buy shoes. I took bus to the city and took train to get home. Then I went to a pool nearby and swam a lot. I was so absorbed in swimming that I couldn't remember how long I swam. I did as long as I liked. Also I relaxed and even smiled when I was swimming in the back stroke. I realized that unnecessary tension has been put on my body through desk work and daily communication. This is a good opportunity to relax my tense body from stress on weekdays.

It looks like that the energy to write something isn't left on me, as I have finished my fork for this week. This is probably good for having a sleep for this night, except for my obsession to write something here everyday is preventing me from just walk away from the screen and go to bed. My condition, and my co-workers' condition is important to my mental stability. When I left my workplace today, I couldn't help checking the room a few times again if I had something left there. I couldn't really be confident that I have things enough just to leave the office. My condition is not bad in that I can do my work every day, but not good enough to do extra activities such as go shopping for something for my hobby.

Just now, when writing another post, I found out one fact. I have been able to make fiction in one way. It has been about cars. In a childhood, I was praised for my illustrations of automobiles. Some one asked "What is this car?" I couldn't answer. It was fictional and imaginary. It was a car I thought was cool then. I imagined many traits of cars I draw. Sometimes I succeeded the entire car, and sometimes I failed and gave up with drawing some parts. I believed that it was my original design. I hadn't realized that how well-thought designs of cars in real world. At that time, I didn't have any idea at all that I was creating a fiction when I was drawing a car. It was certain that I was good at and liked drawing cars. Whenever I was in a stressful circumstance, I couldn't help drawing cars. Now, when I'm thinking I'm to just do, write and draw something, I noticed that one thing I'm able to do has been draw automobiles, and I also...