Maitta! Always - Daily Amazing Confusions -

Rainy season ended in Tohoku region last weekend. August begins tomorrow, and it will be fall on calendar in 10 days. Tohoku's summer on calender is short, but hot days last in August after it sets in "fall".

These days my work goes relatively well, but there is a few problems in my condition. In recent weeks the times I say something to myself aloud doubled. When I walk from the station home after work I sometimes walk dizzily, with my arms and wrist bent oddly. I don't feel so bad. I can even smile. But sometimes I wonder if my smile actually look so stiff that many people would be scared if they say me smiling when I'm tired or I'm in distress. With my boss's advice I paced down my work and took a paid holiday for the next week. My odd behaviors can be the traits that just make me unique and there may be nothing to worry, but it is as long as I'm mentally and physically in good shape.

I worked through this month in addition to previous months. I'm thankful to all who support me, my parents, supporters in my workplace and from the support center.

Replacing my bed is one of my agendas recently. My current one is almost broken. My old bed is probably one reason of my low quality sleep these days. There are a lot of bed frames of wide range of prices. I found one very reasonable, but comparing to another with a fair price, it looked a little bit weaker. I would be satisfied for a while but some time later I may find that the bed was not firm enough to support my body. Thus, I'm also checking more expensive ones. When I'm checking bed online, I almost forget the time and staying up late. Choosing a bed for future quality sleep may be a good thing, but today's sleep is essential for tomorrow's work.

If I speak too much at night, I'm afraid that I may be so excited that I cant sleep enough. This is why I hesitate to take counseling after work.

Coping with ups and downs is one of agendas I have to cope with. Of course I have to be careful enough of overload and lack of sleep, preventing my spirit become much lower, but I also have to behave carefully when my spirit is high. A few days in a month, my spirit becomes so high that I'm eager to learn everything that enters my eye, for example when I'm in a station while going to work ad posters, information and warning signs, columns supporting roof of platforms, and so on. My eagerness continues for a while, but a few days later, my spirit usually gets down even worse than normal. My condition becomes much worse especially when I did too many activities in the period when my spirit is high. To continue to work, narrowing the gap between high and low in my spirit and desirably keeping my spirit high is very important. I care much about behavior, sleep and meals.

If I rested as long as I wish before supper, perhaps it would become midnight before I had supper. This is how my tiredness management isn't working well enough.